wanker
Charlie Casanova
This was like being raped in the ears by Fred West wearing a pineapple for a condom.
Pretentious self indulgent shite from planet WANK. It reminded me of that painful bout of Chlamydia I had back in 2004.
Basically, a bunch of unlikable knob jockeys hang out in a hotel and play cards, and the most unlikable of them all becomes more and more unlikable as he does lots of unlikable things. A truly unlikable film.
I’d rather put chillies in my eyes.
Highs: My feet finally dried out.
Lows: It made me want a bath like when I went to that tramp orgy in 1998.
The Last Circus (foreign)
There aren’t many things scarier than seeing a clown beat someone to death with a trombone. What more can I say! Quite an original story about revenge from a nerdy yet murderous clown.
The first half was brilliantly wacky but then it got too weird.
Highs: a clown in a dress kills half an army with a machete
Lows: I've lost one of the diamonds from my vajazzle. Gutted.
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